rob balucas

Catalyst. Creative. Triathlete. Speaker. Cigar Aficionado. Amateur Behavioral Psychologist. Fresh Spring Roll Addict. Paraplegic at the moment.

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Kona IRONMAN World Championships | Race Recap

A week goes by really fast. Wow. A week ago I was in the race. I’m back home after an amazing time in Kona.

What happened…

(I didn’t make it to the finish line)

I honestly don’t know what happened.

I had a decent swim by my standards.. It was tough, really tough. Gauging from how everyone else described their swim, mine was equally challenging.

My transition wasn’t great, but at least I had everything with me that I needed.

There’s a period for the first few miles of the bike where your body is still in transition from one sport to the next and you’re just trying to find your rhythm and settle in.

I just never found that place … for the next 9.5 hours.

Somewhere in the first 10 miles my chain came out of my rear derailleur and got jammed while I was going 30+ mph on a wonderful downhill.

I had to stop, get some help, dig into my flat kit for my chain breaker, break the chain, fix the problem, reconnect the chain, and then pack up my flat kit. That cost valuable time.

And then after that, I just couldn’t find the sweet spot. I couldn’t maintain the watts (power) necessary to make the bike cutoff. My chain derailed twice more. I missed it by a whopping 75+ minutes.

Did I not drink enough water? All the locals say this year it was way more humid than usual. My paralyzed body is very affected by weather and I don’t like to admit it. My neuropathic pain jumps through the roof when the weather shifts. I still don’t believe it when it happens.

I knew at the midway point at Hawi (mile 60) I wasn’t going to make it back in time. The speed I’d have to maintain wasn’t possible given I had to go right back where I came from through the same rolling elevation and climate.

It became about not quitting. It became about getting ‘home’, on my own power, whether I get to keep going on or not.

At a certain point it was almost doubtful I’d make it back before sundown. But I did.

I could go on and on. One of the other handcyclists here didn’t finish his first Kona IMWC (this year was his 5th). Carlos Moleda, a legend of IMWC and 5-time Champion didn’t finish his first either.

with Bob Babbitt
Breakfast with Bob Interview
Breakfast with Bob Interview
Poncho Man - Breakfast with Bob
Name wall
IRONMAN World Championships

Many have said this just fuels you for the next one. And that might be true at some point.

The thing for me is: I don’t know that I have this level of training in me again. I’ve said before how incredibly intense the training has to be. It has come at the cost of every other part of my life. Anyone who’s been in the orbit of someone training for an IRONMAN knows this fact.

My business has suffered. My relationship and our home has taken lower priority.

It comes at significant financial cost. Many have supported me in this and I don’t want to keep asking for that support.

AND .. I hate that this will be the story if I stop here. I had a DNF in Kona. I had a DNF at the 2019 IM 70.3 World Championships in France. That track record sucks. And I hate that it’s mine right now.

I know there is a lot more in this than that. I know that there’s a victory in just getting to the starting line. I know there’s a lot of value in the journey to get there.

But I didn’t put in all this work just to show up. I didn’t work this hard for years to just get out there.

I didn’t also didn’t do it to win.

I did it for what I thought was very reasonable for me, my athletic ability, and resources.

I just wanted to cross the finish line.

I wanted to hear, “You are an IRONMAN” from Mike Reilly even if I was the last person.

Sure there will be more paratriathlon in my future. Shorter distance stuff for fun and staying fit. But my track record on the big races will be DNF. And that fucking sucks.

But let’s be honest. It’s a blessed life. To have a partner in Erika who supports this journey. To have a community – a tribe – who support me as you have. There’s so much to be grateful for; and I most certainly am.

One of my favorite books speaks of “Finding your edge, and not faking not.”

I found my edge that day. I did the best I possibly could in punishing conditions at the biggest stage in triathlon.

As much as I wish it did, it did not happen any other way.

October 12, 2022

Team Chubby Donut Rides the Marin Century

In 2015, before my crash, I was in a training program towards my first Half IRONMAN and we quickly bonded as a group.

We met up Tuesdays and Thursdays at dawn to ride out of San Francisco, across the Golden Gate Bridge, up Hawk Hill, down the backside to the YMCA, out to Rodeo Beach, and then back.

If you’re a cyclist in San Francisco, you know this ride really well. And you post pictures of the sunrise. And you get really grateful to live in such a cool place.

But if you’re us .. you take it to the next level. You give yourselves a name, you make it a club, make it semi-exclusive (meaning when people would ask we say yes), and then start talking about making cycling kits for no real reason except you really love how funny it is.

There is another group in our neighborhood of cyclists who would pass most of us on those morning climbs. They are called Fat Cake. We decided to call our team …

Chubby Donut.

While I was in rehab we designed a logo and cycling kit. It was purple, pink, accented in sprinkles, and said ‘Fresh and Tasty’ across the butt.

Marin Century | Metric Century Distance

The Marin Century Ride goes up and over and back down the hill I crashed on two years ago. With the support of Team Chubby Donut, I ride in the Marin Century and we ride together down Lucas Valley Road from Big Rock to commemorate the occasion.

The Marin Century happens every year about a month before the anniversary of my crash and a couple of weeks before my birthday. So it’s a very introspect time.

Team Chubby Donut wanted to do the 60-mile metric century route of the ride this year. Last year Peter and I did the easy 25 mile route.

3,500 feet of climbing

The distance was fine. I’ve done 60 miles in my handcycle before.

But what intimidated me was the climbing. 3,600 ft of climb, which is 1,000 more than I’ve ever climbed before. But I told the team .. if you’re willing to rock the hills at 3.3 mph with me, then I’m down.

And rock 3.3 mph we did. Until the last hill, Red Hill Rd in Petaluma. Different things started to strain, the road got narrow and curvy, the heat of the day pounded on my chest and face, and I took a bunch of breaks. That’s where I hit about 3,000 ft of climbing and thought this could be where we have a support vehicle pick me up.

But I hadn’t descended my hill on Lucas Valley Road.

So I got really present. Take breaks if needed. Take fuel. Go a little more and a little more. Keep cranking. Don’t tell me you think we’re near the top, Peter.

And what comes after a climb? A descent. I got to take a rest while traveling upwards of 35mph with my butt 6 inches off the ground. In the video, it’s towards the end where you see Paul catching up with me on a long road.

After that was only one more climb that mattered. The climb to Big Rock and then down the other side where I crashed. Ironically that climb, while not nearly as difficult, was made easier by a deep, involved conversation with Sarah and Peter.

We paused for a break at the top and to turn on all our GoPros. And then we went down the hill:

Nothing has power except that which you give it

A mentor once said to me, ‘Nothing has power except that which you give it.’

I recently met someone who doesn’t ride places they crashed. They give power to those places.

I decided that that hill is just a hill. There’s nothing inherently evil about it. The hill didn’t do anything to me, it was just there. It was there long before me and will be there long after me. So decided not to give any power to this hill.

The guide for this ride says about this descent: “This hill dislikes males age 25–39 (yes, you guys crash here).” I have a secret to not crash like I did: go slow.

So that’s it. We went slowly down the curves at the top. After that was a few miles of 25mph straight descent – and that’s the fun part.

Relive ‘2018 Marin Metric Century’

People ask me what I feel riding down that hill.

Honestly, I don’t feel much. I think about people who think it’s amazing that I’ll ride this hill again. I wish I could show them how powerful this idea – this tool – can be. This hill as no power except that which I give it. And so I decide to give it none. And life goes on.

Now, what else do I give undo power to?

What do you give power to?

—

An Ask: support my ride for the Challenged Athletes Foundation

Not two or three weeks after my crash, I got a text from someone at CAF who’s since become a great mentor and friend.

Since then CAF has supported me by sending me to a paratriathlon camp; awarded me grants for coaching and travel to IRONMANs; gotten me entry into the Escape From Alcatraz Triathlon twice, the Oceanside 70.3 IRONMAN, the CAF B2B NorCal Ride, the Xmas Coma, and numerous others.

Needless to say, this Foundation enabled my goals in sport which I realize more and more every day how much that meant for my recovery overall from this spinal cord injury and paraplegia.

Will you support CAF? (imagine my doe eyes) I’m riding my handcycle with a team during CAF’s San Diego Triathlon Challenge in October. Every bit helps kids and adults have the opportunities I’ve had after a catastrophic life event.

Even better: come ride with us. If you’re a cyclist then join the team. I’d love to have as many people there as possible riding with me.

Here’s the link, do $25. Or $50. Every part gets me to my goal and gets people back into life.

CAF is a 501c3 non-profit, so contributions are tax-dedutible.

Support CAF »

August 22, 2018

BORP revolution ride | ride recap

Last month my buddy John and I rode 45 miles through north Sonoma County to support Bay Area Outreach & Recreation Program (BORP)’s Revolution Ride to fundraise for their programs that support physically disabled people like me.

Right now sudden fires, flamed by high winds have burned a lot of the terrain and scores of homes and wineries and more. It’s really hard to comprehend how these fires have changed / are changing the land and lives there.

But many of us on this ride know just how fast life can change and how to value what’s really important. If you are alive and have loved ones around you, the stuff – though tough to lose – is inconsequential.

more about BORP

One of the amazing non-profit groups that were there to support me was BORP in Berkeley. I was able to ride their handcycle before I had my own to train for my triathlons. I met people just like me and had been riding for years. They even brought their handcycle to the Oakland Triathlon so I could race on it.

Now in 2017 I’m riding in the BORP Revolution Ride on my handcycle to fundraise and support BORP to help even more challenged athletes like me.

Check them out at borp.org

October 11, 2017

california classic weekend

This weekend I rode a metric century including on a closed down freeway! It was amazing to get out with hundreds of other riders in the Central Valley of California.

Thanks to my college buddy, Ed Gonzalez, for riding with me out there!

Finishing strong #metriccentury #handcycle ????cred: @slackmak

A post shared by Rob Balucas (@robbalucas) on Apr 1, 2017 at 3:37pm PDT

April 1, 2017

 

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