9/21 Update: I just shit like a champion.

It was a Soduko-finishing 💩
A dammit-forgot-a-newspaper 💩
A worthy of the Barner Name 💩
A BotoBoyBalucas 💩
A podium 💩
A ‪#‎barreled‬ 💩
An I can’t feel my face, but I love it 💩
A 2-time nurses-clearing-the-room 💩
A depleted the floor of wet wipes 💩
An original nurse didn’t come back 💩
A didn’t need a enema this time 💩 (Fantastic real progress there!)
A haaaaaaaaaadi-hoooooooo 💩
A nurse couldn’t contain mah 💩 💩
A having enough time to wonder if this cute nurse finds me emotionally mature because I’m being vulnerable and unafraid to show her my 💩
A ‪#‎dirtyoldmanintraining‬ 💩

We named the 3 waves:
Gassy Jack
Juicy Josh &
Johnny ‘Go ahead, sweep the leg, see what happens’

In lieu of gifts for the boys, please just have a great 💩. Celebrate it.

And with that, good night all.
Love you, mean it